No matter the plan... we all Blog to Lose!

Went to therapy...

I went to the group infertility support meeting that featured a therapist, whose specialty was counseling folks going through infertility. She herself had gone through this struggle, 30 years ago, and she and her husband had made the decision to end treatments, forgo adoption, and live childless. Now she is writing her dissertation on the topic of stress, depression and infertility.

I'm sure that doesn't sound like a ball of fun, but the session was SO HELPFUL. I didn't know there were so many terms and concepts to describe what infertile couples go through. Like many of you who commented pointed out, going there had the effect of helping me realize what I'm experiencing emotionally through this experience is very common.

It reminds me of things my mom shares with me. She recently lost her husband (not my father, "step"), and has been reading about the grief experience. She has been learning that some of her reactions over the course of the months he's been gone, are actually quite common and that fact makes her feel better, and okay about how she's handling her grief. I didn't know there was something similar for understanding infertility grief. It has stages and everything, and I recognized them all. I just didn't know there was a name for it.

So, I am BEYOND GLAD I went, and I do think this new information is going to give me extra strength to keep plugging along. Managing infertility, especially while still in the phase of trying to get pregnant (versus deciding on an alternative) is a lot of work and a lot of stress, but being aware of these details can help decrease the stress. I kep the therapist's card in case I need a tune-up in the future! I'm sure I will.

0 members like this

Comment by Jill Mace on September 27, 2012 at 2:32pm: I'm so proud of you for going. I am glad it was such a positive ,helpful experience for you. Sometimes we feel guilty for having the feelings that we have. It is so nice to hear that we are normal and thinking and feeling normally. It does make us feel better.

Comment by Lynn on September 27, 2012 at 3:52pm: Hi Dee! I'm glad to hear that you found the experience positive and helpful. This is something I struggled with for many years so feel free to inbox me if you want to chat!

Comment by Keem on September 27, 2012 at 5:03pm: I sort of know what they're going through.
My husband and I wanted to conceive and had problems. The drs said we had a tenth of a 1% chance.

We had given up having any for so many years and then we decided to try again and with research behind us, were successful. Having said that, you do go through a mourning period--like mourning the loss of a dream.....

Comment by Lynette S on September 27, 2012 at 10:12pm: I'm so glad you went, see it wasn't so bad! I'm glad it gave you comfort and strength.

Comment by Almost There on September 28, 2012 at 9:58am: Hugs to you Dee. Sometimes it is so d@#$ difficult to figure out what the universe is trying to tell us to do. Best of luck!

Comment by Dee on September 28, 2012 at 3:47pm: Thank you ALL for the kind, comforting, and encouraging words! Means alot... @Keem, you are so right, there is a feeling of mourning a dream, the therapist put it in almost those exact terms.

Comment by Cindy on September 28, 2012 at 11:25pm: It sounds like it was a really helpful session. I'm sure it's comforting to know that there are many out there who are in the same position. It's not that you would wish it on anyone who wants a child but it just makes things a little easier to take when you know you aren't the only one. This is similar to blogging here and knowing that so many others go through the same things every day with weight loss issues (not that there is any comparison of significance). Hugs to you.

Went to therapy...

You need to be a member of Blog to Lose to add comments!

Badge

Sponsor

Birthdays

Birthdays Today